Friday, September 5, 2014

Nomadic Politics Exclusive: Governor Rick Perry To Release CD of Greatest Hits

by Nomad

In order to help cover his legal expenses following grand jury indictments, Texas Governor Rick Perry has announced plans to release a double CD of country hits. 
"What a great idea!" said Texas Republican strategist (who wished not be identified). "It's time the governor gave the people of Texas something pleasant to listen to."

Outside his close friends, most people are unaware of that Perry has been an amateur country singer and guitarist for decades. Some have even suggested this side of Perry could be the start of a whole new career. 
"I think he's going to do as well as a singer as he did as a governor" said an unnamed loyal supporter. 

According to Jackson Jihl, executive producer for GoodHare Music out of Austin, the playlist will include a mix of cover versions  of such country standards as:

  • "Release Me"
  • "Hello Walls"
  • "You Don't Even Know Who I Am"
  • "Folsom Prison Blues"
  • "You Won't Ever Be Lonely"
  • "It's Just a Matter of Time"
  • "Suspicious Minds"
  • "I Fall To Pieces"
In addition, Governor Perry plans to offer some his personal takes on familiar Country hits like

  • "I Was Corrupt When Corrupt Wasn't Cool"
  • (Feels like)"I've Got A Tiger On My Tail"
  • "(For Two Cigs and some Hooch) I'd Love To Lay You Down"
  • "Four Walls (and a few Steel Bars)"
  • "You're the Reason God Made Prisons"
  •  "(I'm Gonna Miss) Wide Open Spaces" 
  • "My Woman, My Woman, My Cell Mate, Pablo"
  • "Loathsome On'ry and Mean" 
  • "If You've Got The Proof, I'll Do The Time"
  • "Sleeping Double in a Single Bed"
In a statement, Perry's agent and longtime friend of the governor, Mort Tishan told reporters on Thursday:
As part of an exclusive agreement, this limited edition CD can be found only at selected Walmart stores. At $6.99 we expect it to be a real hottie.
Tishan also added that all purchases would be cash only transactions.
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